Sunbeams and Moonwalks (Dumb Dog Trick #265)

What is a sunbeam? What is this magic place of a world we live in?

"Electro-mangetic radiation," some people would say. "The sun light," most would say. (as in, "Duh, sunlight.") I say,

My open letter to the planet:

The sun and moon are my guiding principles. The ocean is more powerful than the combination of the earth, the wind and the sky. My place is here and my time is now.

The truth shall emerge as people age in general and wisdom and responsibility take over the leadership of the continents. Some day we shall all be equal in language, equal in importance and equal in dignity.

Tragedy will befall us all within our lives, but it is in others that we will find strength and help if needed. The incidence of tragic incidents will decrease with the modernization of public transportation systems. The pulse of the earth shall be felt on its rail system and in the advanced versions of navigation and traffic synchronization systems.

The weary who make it to this new world shall survive and flourish. For it is in this next stage of the Earth's existence that true understanding of concepts such as compassion, empathy, religion and medical care shall transform our existence.

Indoor gardening, water beds and Grateful Dead Television will become very popular. Until that time arrives, however, I think I'll pass the time by making dumb dog trick videos.

Jimmyjumpnjive

February 9, 2012

Blow Your Mind (Dumb Dog Trick #264)

Why do I make Dumb Dog Trick videos?

I started doing photography in black and white. Developing photos in the darkroom. Eventually I stopped because, even though my prints were large and beautiful, it was such a pain in the ass to make them. I started making videos when digital technology made it easier to make short films or videos than it used to be to make a single print.

Dumb Dog Tricks is obviously inspired by the David Letterman Show's Stupid Pet Tricks. Did you know that when Animal Planet started Pet Star, Animal Planet got Letterman's Stupid Pet Trick coordinator to round up the talent. And, yes, I was turned down from Pet Star by that dude (can't remember his name) because my act didn't have "pop." But, heck, to be honest, he was pretty nice about it. He was also one of the few people I ever had a real chance to talk about it with. Early days of email. I also think the guy worked pretty hard wrangling a selection of animals. Lots of dog candidates.

So, what do you do? Make your own show.

Who needs pop when I got Dumb Dog Tricks? The point of Dumb Dog Tricks and really any dumb dog video, very funny dog video or what-have-you worth watching is to share the love and fun that pet ownership brings.

I pray you be easily entertained, however, as Dumb Dog Tricks are like Modern Art, the mystique is elusive, if you know what I mean. And how could you know what I mean! Har! Get it? It's that dumb.

What did I just watch? Why did I just watch that? What the hell? I want those :42 back. Hey look, there's links to more of these stupid videos. Hmm I'll try this one.

It has taken me about three years to balance the level of corniness with the immense stupidity and proper tone. It has not come easy. The theme music sound was made by scraping a '57 Chevy bumper against a curb. The photos appear chaotic, even paleolithic in their stark simplicity. The sound of the crazy man's voice conjures images of cigars, cognac and whispered secrets.

The experience of a dumb dog trick visually is similar to what one think when one of our pets leaves a surprise on the carpet -- What the crap is that?

Peace and love to all throughout the land.

Jimmy Jump